Interpersonal Violence Program

Steps to becoming an Active Bystander:

1. Notice the situation: Be aware of your surroundings
2. Interpret it as a problem: Recognize that someone needs help
3. Feel responsible to act: See yourself as being a part of the solution

There are different ways you can choose to intervene.

The 5 D’s of Bystander Intervention

1. DIRECT. Approach the person causing harm, name the inappropriate behavior.
2. DISTRACT. Create a diversion to interrupt harm and/or give the target an opportunity to remove themselves.
3. DELEGATE. Ask someone else for help.
4. DOCUMENT. Create a record of the incident or situation.
5. DELAY. Circle back late if you didn’t intervene in the moment.

A pattern of physically, sexually, verbally, and/or emotionally abusive or controlling behavior in a dating relationship.

Dating/Domestic violence is more than a bruised face or broken arm. It includes:

• Physical Abuse -Any unwanted contact with the other person’s body. Physical abuse does not have to leave a mark or a bruise.
• Sexual Abuse -Any sexual behavior that is unwanted or interferes with the other person’s right to say “no” to sexual advances.
• Emotional Abuse -Saying or doing something to the other person that causes the person to be afraid and/or have lower self-esteem.

How To Support Those Experiencing Dating/Domestic Violence

1. Choose a good time and place to talk.
2. Ask questions and listen without judgement.
3. Emphasize that you are concerned.
4. Let them know that the violence is not their fault.
5. Let them know that NO abuse is ever acceptable.
6. Let them know that help is available.
7. Leave the door open for future conversations.

1. Teach safe and healthy relationships
2. Disrupt the developmental pathways toward partner violence
3. Early childhood training
4. Create protective environments that do not tolerate partner violence.
5. Empower bystanders to help others who are in abusive situations, and provide them with resources and guidance.
6. Watch out for the red flags of partner violence.
7. Bring awareness to the plight of partner violence.

Red Flags

• Extreme jealousy
• Preventing you from making your own decisions
• Constant put downs and verbal threats in person, online, via email or text message
• Being asleep or unconsciousness
• Incapacitation due to excessive use of alcohol or drugs
• Persistent phone calls or text despite being told not to make contact in any form
• Threats to family, friends, property or pets of the victim
• Waiting for the victim at workplace, in the neighborhood/residence hall, after class, and where the stalker knows the victim goes

Abuser: A person who physically, sexually, verbally, or emotional hurts or attempts to control an intimate partner.

Target: A person who is subjected to controlling behavior or hurt physically, sexually, verbally, or emotionally by an intimate partner.

Bystander: A person who is aware or suspects that someone is being abused in a dating relationship. The bystander may become aware of the abuse through the abuser’s or the target’s actions or words.

Any involuntary sexual act in which a person is forced to engage in against her/his will. 

Signs A College-Age Student May Have Been Sexually Assaulted

• Shows signs of depression
• Displays self-harming behavior
• Low self-esteem
• Avoiding specific situations or places
• Falling grades or withdrawing from classes
• Increase in drug or alcohol use
• Anxiety or worry about situations that did not seem to cause anxiety in the past.
• Sexually transmitted infections (STIs)

Engaging in a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to fear for their safety or suffer substantial emotional distress.

• Between 6% to 39% of college students report being stalked since entering college.
• 40% of college students responded to a poll saying they had engaged in at least one type of stalking after the end of a relationship.
• 18 to 24-year-olds experience the highest rates of stalking among adults.
• Students at a higher risk of experiencing staking include women, students of color, LGBTQIA+ students, students with disabilities, students living off campus, and younger students.
• Up to 80% of people stalked on college campus may know who their stalker is.